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My Blog

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Feedin Tube Blues

Good Morning all,
Well it has come down to the fact that we have no choice but to get a feedin tube for Brandon. As you can see from the growth chart inclosed he has been straightlined for awhile and they say it is not good. You only have a certain amount of a window that you can have that will allow you to grow right. Well his window is almost closed so here we go.
Frist things Frist we have to have some reflux test done  and see if he has any reflux if he dosent than he can go with out that fundo thing that keeps them from refluxing. Then he will probaly have the surgery on Dec 1st when he is scheduled to have eye test and maybe a removal, and a hearing test. I hope that all of this will be worth it because I am really bummed about the whole thing. I feel like a worthless failure at times. Then I think Heck I have tried everything possible to help him. His Dr has made it very clear it is not my fault but I do have the choice to either exand his life longer or lessen his life. So we are down to no choice because he is my son and I will not lose him without a fight.

Reminds me of a nursery rhyme
There was an ol lady who lived in a shoe
had so many kids she didnt know what to do

lol I feel like redesignin it to say
there was an ol lady who lived in a shoe
she had a disabled child who she loved so much
but when it came to choices for him she did not know what to do
She had 3 other kids who acted like brats and all she wanted to do
is hide in her closet to get away from life.

Idont know what to do sometimes when it comes to such hard life choices but I do know that I love him and want to help him live a full life. This might be the best thing that ever happend to him but why him. Why does he have to go through so much at such a young age.
So that is what is going on right now with him. So everyone keep him in your prayers!

 


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